Dreams, Shadows of Light
by xentrya
Summary: We all know that at some point,right before changing her ways, Xena cheated Ares with none other than his life long enemy, Hercules...Do you think that the proud God took that lightly or not?...Read the story and check out one version out of many...
1. Dreams

**Dreams- Shadows of Light**

**(Xentrya)**

**Disclaime**r: I do not own the characters of Xena: Warrior Princess. They belong to Studio USA and Renaissance Pictures. No profit has been made from this story, damn!

**1 DREAMS ...**

I always dream about him...Even when the fact that I hate his guts is as clear as daylight, I can't seam to completely get him out of my system...We fight almost every day, we curse each other, inflicting wounds that are deeper and definitely more painful that one could ever imagine, slashing the already thin shields of our souls and cutting right through them , aware that it would only hurt like Tartarus for a very long time.

...Invisible tears fall after each confrontation, vainly trying to ease the agonizing sufferance, to extinguish the consuming flames of remorse frustration and longing that are cremating our hearts inside our furnace like chests, but it's always too late...there's no way to take back what we've screamed at each other. Somehow, the words never fail finding a way to glue themselves to our souls and minds, sticking there like permanent tattoos that only vaguely fade over the years, their contours, even if slightly achromatized, holding their ground to constantly remind us about past mistakes and unfulfilled wishes, acting like some sort of heavy anchor that refuses to let us move on just as it doesn't allow us to go back and mend what we've said and done...

But when night comes, when the last flicker of threatening light has crawled to die at the edge of the mortal realm, he's forever around to haunt my dreams, in some peculiar way always giving me reasons to live, to keep facing the apparently useless day unfolding before my eyes in a matter of hours.

Even tonight, as I close my eyes, and my thoughts start sliding into blankness, letting the undefeatable army of dreams and illusion to gradually take over, I can feel his presence again...in my head this time, but he's there, he never leaves...I guess I wouldn't want him too, either.

This time, the whirl of involuntary memories plunges me deep into a not very distant past, and through the rough fabric of sleep that had numbed my body to any outside reality, my overly exhausted brain starts projecting the images of a rather distressing occurrence that, even after all these years I still can't make up my mind if I want to remember or not...

No time to debate too much about it though, since I suddenly find myself transported into a clearing...a very familiar place I might add, and, as I take a long look around me, I can't shake the feeling that I've been here before...A brief glance to my left and I can see parts of my armor scattered into the grass, and as I instinctively take a better look at myself, I see that I'm wearing nothing but my shift...

As I carefully begin scanning the premises, paying considerably more attention to details this time, I suddenly feel two strong arms enfolding affectionately around my waist and my heart skips a beat as I hear a very comforting voice whispering against my ear:

"Are you by any chance looking for me?"

Despite myself, I can't hold back a warm smile teasing my lips, and , turning around to face the one holding me, I just casually wrap one hand around his neck as I allow the other to roam freely on the surface of his perfectly sculpted chest, and I almost give in the desire to kiss him , but not before I murmur seductively in return:

"I was starting to miss you already..."

I don't have to act in any way though, he just does it for me, and when his lips finally press to my own again, I can genuinely feel a very unusual tenderness fill me inside out, along with a sensation of utter freedom that I haven't experienced for a very long time now...I almost feel pure again, my hands no longer stained with the darinless stains of crimson blood dripping from the eternally dying bodies of my cortège of victims, my heart unchained from that never ending darkness that had held it captive for so long...

As the kiss breaks and we gently pull apart, I just chuckle softly before inquiring , a mischievous tone in my voice:

"So did the mighty Hercules find the lake? I almost feared that you might have gotten lost into the woods..."

"Well, I would have certainly cried out for help before nightfall! Luckily I have the fearless Warrior Princess around to save me from the big bad wolf, you know, just in case..." he replies, bemused by my previous remark, pulling me into a more demanding, passionate kiss this time, our tongues entwining, exploring, fighting for possession of each other's mouths, our teeth playfully biting and teasing.

And right out of nowhere, without any prior warning, he hastily lifts me off the ground as if I weight noting at all, seemingly lacking the slightest intention to break the kiss too, and the scene is absolutely breathtaking. I literally feel like I've been magically transformed overnight in some sort of fairytale Cinderella- currently taken to bed by her own unbelievably handsome Prince Charming that has just saved her from the selfish, evil step mother.

The next thing I know, in between giggles and broken pieces of conversation, he lays me on the soft, swaying grass, leaning over me to pick up from where we've just left off minutes ago, our greedy hands desperately trying to claim possession of the others' body, his fingers already unlacing the fastenings of my leather shift while mine have skillfully started undoing the ones of his pants, both of us panting, groaning and moaning heavily, and, out of breath as we are , completely entranced by the overwhelming effect of our kisses and caresses, we almost rip each other's clothes off, as the classical method of getting rid of them just seams to be taking too long...

In the heat of the moment though, we pull back for a minute to look each other in the eyes again, and we just start laughing without saying one more word, as we realize that we're acting like two horny teenagers that have sneaked out to be together- the thought instantly makes the demi-god's visage shine even brighter then before...

We could take it slower I guess, enjoying it more, loosing ourselves gradually into the other's murmurs and wanting grinding, but that's close to impossible given the fact that, the erotic sensation of his thumb brushing the surface of my lips and that piercing gaze coming from his equally cerulean eyes makes my body burn like a flame...

Still, despite the obvious shivers of pleasure traveling up and down my spine, something in the back of my mind stops me from fully savoring the sweetness of his every kiss and the suavity of his touches...

Inhaling deeply, I firmly close my eyes, vainly attempting to block whatever is holding me back , aware that, besides satisfying my own selfish needs, I do owe this man everything that I am right now, and along with it, the chance to a new, better life, his compassion and patience having revealed me the trace of a different path to follow, my rebirth if you will...The least I can do is to make him feel the same mixture of joy, serenity and boundless outbreak that I'm feeling right now.

...And thus, I give myself to him, for what I already know to be one single night, body and soul, determined to let him heal all those emotional wounds and scars that I haven't even known were there until I felt them vanish like a trail of smoke under the surreal effect of his whispers and thrusts...

He's inside me now, plunging deeper and deeper, making my body tremble with each move , and I can hear him grunt lowly against my ear, getting me more and more aroused by the second, despite the fact that simultaneously, my heart stings harder and harder as the dark shade of guilt and utter betrayal starts poisoning my mind, feeding my brain with the still fresh images of an unimaginably sad and disappointed War God's gaze fixing me intensively before it exploded with fury and revolt as I told him that I was deliberately giving up on everything that still bounded me to him...

_..."And this was just a few hours ago...",_ I murmur silently inside my clouded mind, as Hercules almost reaches his climax, my muscles tightening unbearably hard around his cock, and I can't hold it any longer- the tension, the ecstasy the regret, the disgrace- I just let them all out in the form of an almost savage "Gods yessssssssss!" scratching his back uncontrollably as my nails dig deep into his flesh.

We're both out of breath now, and, seconds after our lips brush lightly again, I finally rest my head on his chest, my body tightly wrapped in between his strong arms, waiting for the reminiscent effects of that unearthly orgasm to run off.

I almost smile. I'm almost ready to let each and every muscle of my body relax, determined to leave the past behind at least for the rest of the afternoon, letting that new found peace to wash over me completely...It's impossible though, cause, right out of nowhere I instantly feel it, so strong, so overwhelming- his dark, unmistakable presence , making blood literally freeze inside my veins...And it's not fright I feel, it's pain, agonizing pain as if somebody had ripped the heart out of my chest, slicing and burning it at the same time.

As realization hits me with the force of a massive rockslide, I can barely pull a gasp of air inside my lungs...Ares...he's here...he...

Through our bond I can sense his immeasurable sufferance too, invading even the last cell of my body, choking me...And then all of the sudden he's gone...leaving but a trace of horrible emptiness inside my shattered soul.

"Xena? " Hercules askes, cupping my chin to lift my head up."Is everything all right?"

I give him a faint smile, but a smile nonetheless.

"Everything's perfect" I whisper back, swallowing hard...

As I burry my head back in his chest he fails to see the tears streaming down my face...


	2. Decisions

**2 DECISIONS...**

It's almost nightfall . As I decide that in spite of Hercule's insistent and overly tempting pleas I can't do it, that throwing myself head first in a relationship with a man I barely got to know just out of gratitude -even if our souls are joined through an undeniable connection now- given that he had purified my soul and showed me another path in life - we part saying our goodbyes, both aware that the time for anything more than what we've just shared couldn't be more wrong right about now.

I just have to make up for that pile of bodies that I've been dragging behind me for so long now without even realizing it...There were so many deaths, so many broken dreams, that I literally feel from all my heart that I'd have to live more then ten lives to clean up at least partially that horrible mess I've made, to wash away at least a part of the blood from my hands, to make some of the stains disappear...

Finding a way to pay for all those salty rivers of tears that I have been causing for so long now would make a good goal in life ...Finding my peace-an alluring mirage that could help me wake up in the morning...Hercules said that redemption could offer me that, and that assuming the responsibility for my choices, learning to live with the consequences of my past actions, might just help...I don't believe it, but it's worth a try...

One thing I know for sure though: there is no real forgiveness for people like me...no second chances...I personally see what's left of my existence as a short span of time, generously offered to me in the sole purpose to undo the wrong I've caused to so many people that my mind refuses to count...It's their souls that will receive comfort not mine...It's all about them...my victims...the shadows...

...As for Hercules, he himself is in desperate search for some peace of mind, trying to find some decent way to erase those painful, repulsive scars of his own agonizing soul...

No...it is definitely not the right moment for us...

...My lips pressed tightly now, I cast another glance around me, the heaviest weight hanging from my heart like a milestone...Deep inside, at some well buried level of consciousness I'm well aware that all these senseless thoughts are in fact nothing but worthless justifications that my brain is feverishly looking for in order to avoid admitting that the main reason for which I adamantly refuse to let things go any further with the kind and gentle demi-god, is Ares...I could never do that to him...Plus, the pain I felt earlier is still so vivid and sharp inside each and every fiber of my being that it scares me to death...I have to see him, I have to explain everything to him...He should know why I did it...He deserves that much...

XXX

After a two hours ride that actually seams like having taken rather a burdensome forever, I finally arrive back at Ares' temple, where, just hours ago, we had such awful fight that I genuinely thought he was going to blast me on spot, despite the bottomless patience he had always showed when it came to me.

I don't even know why I decided to come here in the first place, it's not like he's still lurking around this damned place...Knowing him as I do, he's most likely on some boiling with action battlefield somewhere, drawing as much blood as he can out of the exhausted bodies of some miserable, starving to death soldiers that barely have the strength to still hold the sword in their hands, trying to blow off some steam, doing his best to bridle the urge to just find me and slice my mortal carcass into little pieces...burying the unnatural pain he hadn't have the chance to come across during the countless eons of his eternal life till today...

For some awkward reason that I'm still unable to disseminate, my brain still has trouble believing that he actually saw the whole Hercules scene, and left doing nothing at all ... By all Gods and Goddesses...

When I reach the top of the stairs, as if beyond my control, my feet refuse to take another step forward, my suddenly tired eyes fixing absently the huge bronze doors of the main entrance...I've never been afraid of him...never... As he himself said it more than once, I've been the first mortal in the history of mankind who has dared making a sport out cockily defying him, testing his limits without the slightest shade of wonder or fear in my eyes , but somehow, I can't stop thinking that what I 'm doing right now it's pure suicide...If the shock of telling him that I was adamant about leaving behind me everything he stands for, everything that we've built together somehow prevented him to a certain extent from sending me on the other side of the Styx faster than I was able to blink, the actual image of me betraying him with the one person he hated till the pits of Tartarus and back with every cell of his immortal body, that was unforgivable.

In a way, maybe that's what I'm looking for after all: Death- a final liberation, the shortest and definitely the most effective way out of a life in which I don't really find myself any more...Some sort of irremediable ending, a closure, under the blade of the only one that I've ever loved with all my heart...

As the realization of what I actually did finally strikes me, washing over me like an ice cold shower, my cheeks suddenly turn crimson...I always had the habit of throwing in his face the fact that he was nothing but a worthless egocentric Bastard that couldn't care less about anyone else but himself, even when I knew how untrue that statement was ...And just look at me now... Selfish, ungrateful, soulless...you name it...I'm so ashamed...Maybe I don't even deserve to die, after all...maybe I deserve to suffer, to live torturing myself with the awareness of how much I've hurt him...

With a quick turn, I'm on the verge of dropping it all and head it down the stairs, leaving the premises faster than I came back, aware that facing him now would be useless anyway ...In the cold light of dawn, he'd be way too mad to even kill me...Plus, dead I couldn't tell him all the things I still desperately need him to know.

Almost in slow motion, I start descending the first three steps, as if fearing that at the most insignificant noise he could detect my presence, pressuring me to face him, when, right out of nowhere, I'm nearly deafened by the fulminating sound of a devastating explosion, followed by the ever so familiar one of tones of stone crumbling to the ground...A pillar probably...

Then, there's a heartbreaking growl that, instantly, without the faintest warning, forces two bitter tears to fall down my cheeks, dropping on the dirty stairs beneath my feet, tearing my soul apart...he's in there...hurting like Tartarus, his heart crushed in pain...

I couldn't leave now, not even if I wanted to...


	3. Payback

**3 PAYBACK...**

As I push the large doors open, my jaw drops to the floor...there's nothing left of the large altar room I had just been in hours before...nothing except debris and bulky chunks of marble and stone, covering the ground. I gasp in surprise looking above me, wondering how in Chronos' name was the temple still standing, sustained by only two arches and three pillars...The roof should have crumbled to pieces by then...

Scanning the place, a quite difficult job to do through all that white, smothering alabaster dust, I see Ares at the opposite side of the room, his palms and forehead leaning in defeat against the cold wall before him, in the pose of a man who is carrying the weight of the entire humanity on his shoulders, his nails scratching nervously the surface of the dark grey stone.

I instantly close my eyes and automatically turn my head to the other side...I can't bare to look at him, to watch him breaking apart like this...It's an impossible sight to see... I'd rather die than live with myself after what I've just witnessed...

As I summon up the courage to walk towards him, I can see his muscles flinch way before I reach the center of the room...he knows who it is, he just refuses to acknowledge my presence...

It's almost funny, all of it. Despite the bleakness of the situation I can't help remembering how many times I did the very same thing, torturing him with my utter indifference after some stupid fight we had...I guess he's pretty much performing my own role right now, and he seams to be doing one hell of a job ...

I'm just steps away from him...I wonder if I should reach out and touch his shoulder or something...

As if in the weirdest of dreams, I'm trying to raise my hand to comfort him, to let him know how sorry I am...Instead, choking up my desire, I automatically cover my lips with the tips of my fingers as if fearing that I might say something out of place, all this time having this indescribable, striking deja vue felling that it had all happened before...all of it...

I open up my mouth to utter his name, but the sounds won't come out...

When I try again, my voice is barely audible...He doesn't answer, so I silently ask myself if he'd actually heard me in the first place...

While I bite my lips savagely, swallowing hard before summoning the courage to call him one last time, there's finally a reaction...Not what I expected, that's true, and my heart almost leaps out of my chest when he half turns his head in my direction -he doesn't look at me though, his eyes are cemented to the floor.

It only lasts a few seconds, but it's all the time I need to notice the fresh trails of tears still glistening on his perfect visage...

Another warm drop glides uncontrollably down my face the following second, mixing with the dust that has me completely coated by now in a pale white cover, seemingly wanting to turn me in a life size statue of some sort.

"Ares ?" I utter , louder this time, loud enough so that he can't keep avoiding me...

As he slowly turns around , apparently granting my wish, my self defense mechanism reaches sky high levels, my pupils dilating beyond control at what I know it should normally transform into a life and death confrontation in less than five seconds or so...

Instead, knocking me for a loop, he just passes me by as if I'm not even there, without bothering to cast one single glance my way, ready to dematerialize from the place.

It takes but one tiny moment until, realizing what he's planning to do, I grab his arm, desperately hoping to draw his attention, to have him stay, to make him listen, and I can only suppose that my reckless gesture was for him the last straw, because it definitely made him blow harder than a barrel of black powder, slapping me across the face with the back of his hand so hard, that I don't even realize how in the world did I get on the floor to begin with, why is my bottom lip bleeding and most of all, as things gradually start clearing up a little inside my head, why did my body refuse to defend itself?

...That slap...I did see it coming...

"Why are you here Xena?" he yells at me, his voice ragged and broken , his eyes half blinded with tears that he can barely hold back...I can read him so easily...just as I can read the inner struggle with himself to restrain the agonizing urge to hit me again and again and again, unleashing his wrath on me until there is nothing left.

I'm not surprised...I was expecting this...and more for where that came from...

I part my lips to speak, and I do manage to do it, despite the fact that I don't actually know what to start with...I could apologize, but what for? For wanting a better life for myself? For finally waking up from that deep slumber in which nightmares of endless carnage, revenge, greed for power and ultimate darkness were tormenting incessantly what was left from my soul? For miraculously having allowed someone else shake me back to reality, and show me the ocean of blood and loneliness I was bathing in?

" _In spite of how much you hate the thought, Hercules did save that last seed of goodness and humanity still left in me, Ares...something you couldn't do no matter how hard you tried...And you did try...You did warn me, you did teach me how important it was to always have a balance constantly weighing the darkness and light inside my soul...I just wouldn't listen..." _I say to myself, praying to all Gods that I can gather the words to also voice it without sounding accusing I any way...

"I just want us to talk..."

Watching him now, I know that I'll never forget this indescribable expression of sheer rage and ultimate brutality glittering briefly on the surface of his once cocky but secretly affectionate eyes...

As he begins shouting again, he lifts me off the ground by the shoulders as if I am made out of wax, and I can't help groaning inhumanely as I literally feel his iron like grasp clenching my joints with such force that I'm sure he is about to crush them bit by bit, stopping only the minute he'd be done getting out even the last scream of pain of my lungs.

The atrocious suffering suddenly faints away though as another one, hardly bearable this time, makes way the instant my back collides with the opposite wall, and judging by the force with which he had thrown me across the room I can't help marveling at the fact that I'm still conscious.

"To talk? No...you're not actually here to talk, are you now?' he screams against my ear, but strangely enough, his voice is but a far away echo...the excruciating sensation of my entire body being broken to pieces somehow managing to keep my mind caged at some totally different level of awareness...

The room is spinning along with every single thought in my head.

I open my eyes, frowning slightly at the sight of his black leather boots -all covered in white marble dust just like the rest of the place- so close to my face , and I can't help staring at them in utter bewilderment, until I finally realize that I am laying on the floor.

Call it a double take if you will, but the actual meaning of his last phrase is hardly decoded by my overly exhausted brain, my head still throbbing after the previous impact with the solid stone wall.

Trying to regain control over my visibly limp form, I'm sending a rather vain command to my hands and feet, wanting to move...all I get in return is the ability to slightly drag my right foot, and an insignificant amount of energy that I unwisely put in propping my aching body on my lower arms in an useless effort to get up.

He'll put me off my misery the following second though, I can tell it by that scrappy sound of his blade as he draws it out of its scabbard ...Thinking back about it now, he was never the type to find any pleasure in tormenting his victims...He had always been a rather straightforward guy...

I distinctly feel the smell of his musk and cinnamon cologne as he bends down to grab me by the hair, pulling my head up to his face, so close that our lips are almost brushing, waiting for an answer to which by now, I forgot the question in the first place.

Nonetheless, as courteous as ever, he's more then ready to remind it to me , and the next thing I know I'm being yanked back on my feet, by my hair of course, pinned against the cold wall by the brute force of his immortal body, the sharp edge of his sword already grazing my neck, making a fine trail of blood trickle down my chest, his every breath so heavy and labored as if he has just finished covering the bloody distance from Marathon to Athens and back.

Two more tears began their sinuous path down my cheeks, confirming the physical suffering that he had managed to inflict, letting him know that he had successfully achieved his purpose, and when the blur in my eyes slowly begins dissipating, he simply stares at me a couple of seconds, his own darkened moons completely devoid by any type of emotion, before stating on a tone that I haven't imagined him using with me with my life- the one usually reserved for the soon to be dead Warlords that had committed outrageous offenses against his name and status...

My own eyes hollow, gaze stricken with grief, regrets and remorse I bow my head in shame, his harsh stare burning me as if wanting to melt the flesh from my skull. I can't look him in the eyes, I just can't...

"Look at me!" his voice bursts out commandingly, making my muscles tense involuntarily, letting the sword drop from his hand and clenching both of his hands around my neck now, chocking me to death, easily lifting me a few inches off the ground, my own hands gripping pointlessly against his, trying to make him stop, without actually articulating the plea.

Slowly panicking, my wide blue orbs meet his, and I can actually feel his fiery breath mixing with mine, my heart pounding so loud underneath my ribcage that I'm sure it's absolutely impossible for him to not have sensed it too, pressing wildly against his chest.

He's so close to me now...so unbearably close that I can even detect the surge of adrenaline traveling up and down his veins, pumped towards his brain at unbelievable speed, the same way in which I can feel my blood, my own blood gliding down his hands, and further down to his wrists...

For less than a second, my now erratic mind seams to disconnect form the dim reality, sending me to another place and another time, towards the beginning of our relationship, when, after a long, exhausting training day, completely drained both physically and emotionally, I failed to parry properly a rather basic attack that I had no problems blocking all day long till that very then.

He had accidentally managed to graze my neck back then too, with the tip of his sword, and I can distinctly remember that unmistakable shade of horror in his eyes as he saw the blood streaming down my chest, fearing that the cut had been deep enough to produce some serious damage. In order to help me, he got his hands stained with my blood back then too...The circumstances were different, that's true, but still, in my delirious mind, the overall image was strikingly similar...

We were probably sharing the same memory too during those illogically long milliseconds , cause the moment his acid tone snaps me out of it, my stomach still in knots, his face seams to have lost part of that scary statue like hardness:

"Get out of my sight, Xena, and don't make the mistake to come back here again, or I swear it on Styx, I'll slice you to pieces!" he utters lowly, dropping me back at his feet, a gaze of such obvious contempt in his eyes that, had he screamed in my face that I was nothing but a worthless piece of trash that deserves nothing from life, the effect wouldn't have been that devastating to my already low morale.

That's when I actually realize the immense amount of pain boiling inside him ...he swore it on Styx...he's trying to keep me away by any means, aware not necessarily by the fact that he wouldn't be able to control his anger, but rather fearing that the ripping pain he is currently feeling might just tear him apart...

"I'm sorry..." I break out, trying to keep my voice steady.

He just sneers at me bitterly, his mouth twisted in disgust:

"You're sorry..." he hardly articulates on a low tone, instinctively balling up his fists, just to stretch his fingers back automatically the instant he realizes what he was about to do. "You 're sorry?!" he repeats the question seconds after, this time shouting it from the top of her lungs, blasting another energy ball to one of the walls, raising the barely settled dust into the air again, it's presence making me cough violently.

"Were you sorry just hours ago when you were letting that damned Bastard fuck your brains out? Cause it sure seamed to me that you were enjoying yourself big time and..."

He stops in mid phrase though before getting to finish it, turning his back at me, his eyes probably way too troubled and his jaw way too clenched to still pretend that this hadn't affected him more than anything else in his life had up to this point.

"Is this why you...?"

"No!" I instantly react, vainly attempting to hide the desperation in my voice, while clumsily stifling a loud sob. "Ares, just hear me out, it's..."

"What?! What could you possibly still say to me?!"and his barked out line makes my whole body flinch, my hands starting to rise defensively towards my face only to freeze halfway as I understand that he has no intention of hitting me again.

"I love you..." I begin screaming louder than before if that is even possible, covering completely the last words of his exclamation, wondering before I even get to finish my reply it if I'm really that crazy as my completely out of control brain wants to make me believe.

It was like adding fuel to the fire...

"I love you" I murmur again.

Silence...Absolute silence...It won't last long, that I already know, since I can already outguess his reaction...It's not that hard to tell, I can see it so clearly in the edgy moves with which he throws his head back before he starts bending his neck from right to left and from left to right, releasing some of the pressure, getting ready for whatever he has in store for me...

"You love me..." his voice echoes as his boot collides this time with my stomach, making me literally kneel before him, gasping for air, my fingers digging convulsively into the thick carpet of broken marble and stone, the rough edges of which I just feel I've cut my right palm into.

"Ok...let's see just how much you love me" he answers promptly against my ear, making sure that I hear him, and the tone on which he chose to utter the phrase makes my eyes glue to his diabolically challenging face.

Before I realize what's going on, he's viciously blasting an energy ball at me, crashing my back against that accursed wall again, and I think I can hear my spine crack during the impact, but it must have been a mere impression cause I can still stand, which is a good thing, I guess...

This is not going to have a happy end, I can feel it...


	4. Just a reminder

**4 JUST A REMINDER...**

***Hi all...just wanted to let you know that from this point on the story will get a bit dirty...Don't mean to spoil the fun, but you should know though...As much as I love Ares, he did have a dark side, so you'll be seeing it pretty soon, step by step:)***

"...So...What do you say? How far would you go to make it up to me, Princess?..." I ask , spitting almost in disgust that lovely pet name I regularly use for her, fully aware of what I'm challenging her to do, notes of sarcasm and absolute frustration reverberating from my thick, barely recognizable voice.

"How about it?" I continue, while moving one hand beneath her chin, gripping her jaw this time, and I can physically feel a thin cover of ice forming on the surface of my fiery eyes, veiling whatever feelings my particularly alert brain still considered that needed to be hidden.

"I tell you what..."another low whisper fills the air , and I can't help arching an eyebrow while gazing brazenly at her voluptuous breasts, making that heavy amour vanish from her body withink a blink- not trying to make her feel more comfortable in any way, but in order for me to have a better view- "Let me make things easier for you" I keep talking, watching in absolute indifference the sky high affliction settling on her face as she finally realizes that the tone I'm using while addressing her doesn't set her apart in any way from those common whores she'd seen me scattering away in complete repulsion even when I was dead drunk a couple of times at various banquets we attended together.

"Despite the coded message that still ecstatic brain of yours is sending you, you're not here because you can't leave with the guilt...No...it's way too soon for that, doll. ...And you certainly haven't decided to grace me with your presence out of the magnanimous consideration for the hypothetical feelings I have for you..." I stop for a second, as I notice that she had lowered her gaze again and I expertly lift her chin higher, forcing her too look at me...She still doesn't have the stomach to look up. But she will, soon...

"What actually brought you here is the unfortunate realization that you made a mistake-one that you are not ready to admit yet, that's for sure, but one which subconsciously, eats you alive like worms hungrily devour a dead body...It's that bloody connection that we share, that draws you to me like a moth to a flame, that makes you feel complete, that gives your life meaning...and that you just couldn't find while my dear mongrel half brother was kindly plunging inside you this after noon, despite those pretty intense moans and pants coming from your dirty little mouth,- I might add- am I right? " I inquire, tightening my grip even more as if wanting to rip the flesh of her face, and I can barely restrain the overpowering desire to slap her again.

"Of course I am...How could I not be? So...let me hear you say it...Why are you really here for? " I add, while letting my other hand slide up her thigh and under her shift, pushing her legs apart with my own, making her wince nervously the instant I start rubbing her cunt through the silky fabric of her undergarment, with teasingly slow strokes at first, strokes that turn more eager and more fevrish by the second, almost brutal by the time I remove my other hand from her chin, allowing her to speak.

"I'm here to talk!" she finally breaks out loudly through clenched teeth, trying to push me away with her hands with a cheaply theatrical expression of agonizing effort and pain, but her performance doesn't impress me too much-I've seen better- so I just push her back against the wall, making her groan in real pain now as my hand clasps back against her neck, pinning her there as two of my fingers and then three, find their way inside her hot dripping pussy, sliding in and out her, making her body squirm in both pleasure and pain, while I murmur lowly against her lips before claiming them into a savage, animalistic kiss that only makes her inner muscles convulse even harder around my fingers, making me escape aloud, involuntary moan inside her mouth.

" Fine...Heart to heart conversations are my speciality." I add mockilgly. "Start talking...I can listen..."

"Mmmmmmm..." I can feel the sound struggling to smash the barrier of her visibly tense jaw as I break the kiss and pull back to give her the chance to reply.

"Let me go!" she orders in return, fighting more with herself than with me, vainly protesting against the undeniable pleasure that my fingers thrusting inside her faster and deeper now make her feel, her body starting to shake in uncontrollably shivers as I began hitting her G spot with each plunge.

"I would if you didn't enjoy so much what I'm doing to you...and if your arms wouldn't be holding to me for dear life, like chains..." I emphasize, taking a long look at the way in which she had unconsciously wrapped her arms around my neck, almost embracing me, driving me crazy with her nearness.

Two more violent thrusts and she's about to come.

I can fell the tension building inside my own body as well as I can feel my cock aching to fill her, throbbing inside my pants, rubbing against her crotch with each shove of my fingers.

Her muffled moans grow unbearably loud, impossible to restrain, nearly turning into screams as she's but moments away from her climax, the perfect time for me to extract my fingers from within her though, completely stopping what I was doing, but without letting go of her neck where I can already predict there would be a dark purple bruise in the morning...

She's just staring at me now, completely dazzled, not knowing what to believe, still panting uncontrollably, her chest rising and falling irregularly while looking for a normal rhythm of breathing, her eyes glued on me, as I began liking my fingers...the ones with which I just fucked her, rubbing my thumb against her lips, letting her taste her own wetness, tracing the contour of that irresistible mouth that gives me a hundred lecherous ideas by the minute, all of them making my shaft the prime star of the picture.

"I thought you wanted us to... talk...?" I inquire detachedly, subtly scoffing her still puzzled expression as I'm now using my tongue to feel the sweet sour taste of her luscious lips, getting her completely off balance as I begin to slowly undo the fastenings of her black silk shift, starting from her breasts, and soon she's trying to push me away again , her voice much more hoarse and convincing than the first time:

"Gods you can be such an ass sometimes! Let go of me already!" she shouts from the top of her lungs, fresh tears glistening on the surface of those incredibly cerulean moons of hers that have haunted my sleep years in a row, even when she was just on the other side of bed, or even closer, encased safely into my arms...

This time, she uses all her remaining force in a rather pathetic attempt to hit me across the face, but I easily stop her half way, grabbing her wrist, and looking her in the eyes with such an icy, piercing look that I can feel her resistance melting progressively as I hold my gaze fixed upon her.

I do as she says though, I'm letting go of her, throwing her to the floor as if she were some cheap slut that wasn't even worth my effort.

"You should leave...Hercules is probably **worried sick**, looking for you...Waiting for round two.." " I utter, biting my lip so hard that it hurts the very instant I finish the sentence. "

"Will you just cut the crap already? This isn't about Hercules, that's a part of my life that doesn't concern you! This is about us. I'm here because I was worried about you!" she replies bitterly, directing an accusing glare straight towards me, and hearing her I can feel the brain explode inside my skull.

"Since when in Tartarus, you fucking Hercules or any other lousy mortal for that matter doesn't concern me anymore?" I bark back at her and I can her my own voice echoing throughout every corner of the barely standing temple, so deafening that for a moment there I almost believe it is about to crush on our heads.

As I look down at her again I can see the effect that I have on her. She knows me far to well to tell that right now, there's just a thin almost invisible line that I'd need to cross in my blinding rage in order to tear her limb from limb. And the idea it's actually so unspeakably tempting that I can almost feel the taste of her blood in my mouth, that sweet crimson poison of her claret, invading my veins, my heart and my brain altogether.

"Is that how you want it to be ? Huh? "I keep on yelling , lifting her up again, forcing her to stand up, to face me. "And you still have the nerve to talk about us? What "us" Xena? cause you certainly made sure to trample on that notion the minute you let that scumbag touch you!" I can't stop myself from shouting, slamming my fist against the wall, inches from her head, with so much force that I can hear the stone cracking under the impact, wishing with all my heart that I could just have the guts to do that to her, and get that weight off my chest.

"It didn't mean anything, ok?" she screams back just to whisper it again a few seconds later, so lowly that I can hardly hear it. "Ares...It didn't..."

She only manages to make my anger reach impossible levels.

"So let me see if I understand...You meet the guy, he has you panting like a bitch in heat- screwing you to oblivion for a couple of hours- and puff, just like that, he changes your entire vision about the world? Well...that must have been one hell of a fuck doll... And now, to top it all, here you stand before me, telling me that it didn't mean anything, and that you only did it for what...fun, Xena? Answer me!" I snap, my every muscle so tense as if it is about to explode, rising my hand to smack her again, and to my utter surprise, she doesn't even flinch, as if she wants me to hit her, to hurt her...

For Zeus knows what reason though, as I look deep inside her eyes I somehow can't bring myself to do it... She takes care of that of course, in less than a blink, as her gaze suddenly turns cold and her following line drills a whole straight through my chest, craving out everything that still had a flicker of life there:

"Well...what do you expect? A girl needs to have a little fun form time to time, just so that she doesn't forget how a real man feels like...Nothing serious...just a reminder..."


	5. Feeling good?

**5 FEELING GOOD?**

As the words pop out of my mouth, rolling like pearls , I can see his beautiful chocolate brown eyes growing darker and darker...By the time I finish my phrase there is nothing human left inside them, there's just a dim flicker of hurt and sadness...the rest is made out of incommensurable fury and loose desire to make me regret every single syllable that I've had the guts to articulate...

Rough is a poor word for what awaits me, that much I know...At least he'd give in the urge to inflict me as much pain as he can and then we'd be even...Maybe this would somehow fill the void I can tell he feels inside his heart too...the one I've caused in the first place...

"_Come on, give me your best shot...let's get this over with already" _my mind silently begs, hoping that he would just unleash his wrath one me, hitting until there will be nothing left but a bag of bloody bones...He is wrong...I** can** feel the guilt, I felt it back then, in Hercules' arms too...and it does cause excruciating pain...worse than cyanide or henbane ever could...

I suddenly see him so clearly now...almost in slow motion, I'm watching his eyelids falling heavily over his equally tired eyes, as if resting, the expression of his face changing gradually form disbelief to indignation, tantrum and rage- the same type of volcanic, blind rage that he'd once told me to be on the look out for whenever I was with him and which I had to avoid at any cost if I valued my life...

"Just leave..." he murmurs dangerously low, taking a small step back and he jerks his hands off me so fast, as if keeping them on the surface of my skin could burn the flesh from his bones to a crisp- melting it. He's shakingly bringing them to his temples instead, pressing as hard as he can.

"What is it God of War? Is the truth giving you a headache by any chance? What can I say? Want me to lie? ...Gaia has endowed him better...Can't blame the man for being soooo good at what he does...And he was ...ahhhhh...**good**" I feign a low, seductive moan, throwing my head back in simulated ecstasy "...My legs start shaking only thinking about it...I can still feel his smell on my skin..."

His red, irritated eyes have turned pitch black by now, his chest, rising and falling at incredible speed telling me what I still needed to know... This is it...From this moment on, I'm positive that as time will slowly pass, memories will get more and more blurry by the seconds...

"You're really asking for this aren't you? "

"I don't know...Do you have what it takes for what I'm asking for? ...Or should I just beg for Hercules' attention again?" I add with a smirk, deliberately mocking him.

He starts quite childishly, rather uncontrollably at first, having the impulsive movements of a madman, so , when I distinctly feel his hands clenching around my bruised neck like a garrote for the third time or so since I've arrived here, adamant about chocking the life out of me, making me fight for air, enjoying the sight of me dying at his feet, I'm not as surprised and desperate as he would probably want me to be. It's already a familiar sensation after all.

Consequently, the moment I feel Celesta's presence getting closer and closer to my instinctively struggling body, he seams to be changing his mind, looking for some less boring activity for me to enjoy too.

"Oh...you'll beg all right..." And it suddenly hits me-the realization that simply smashing me to pieces would be way too easy for him...he's talking about something else...

The next thing that registers inside my mind like the after effects of a tornado is the ripping pain of being dragged by the hair towards the altar where he carelessly throws me flat on my stomach, tearing the shift from my trashing body in one single move, pinning me face down to the glacial marble surface and making sure to apply so much pressure on my spine with one of his hands- while parting my legs with the other- that I genuinely feel that I'm about to black out in pain...He is using his godly powers that's for sure, 'cause I sure can't explain that surreal force he's applying on my already aching back otherwise...

Right when I think he's but mere seconds from making it snap though, he withdraws his hand...and before I can even react in any way, he seams to focus his attention on a totally different activity, ramming his cock inside me, plunging so deep and with so much force that I can't help screaming in pain.

Deliberately of course, he leaves me no time to adjust with the size of him, pushing me even harder on the altar , the same altar where along with my soldiers I've brought sacrifices in his name just days ago, and he's pumping so violently that my feet are not touching the ground any more, keeping me rather suspended a good ten inches into the air, my breasts rubbing brutally against the usually fine marble surface that's all covered now in dust and grit, grazing my chest uncomfortably.

My breath locked inside my lungs now, I'm grinding my teeth, closing my eyes and biting my lips ferociously, all in all, doing my best to shut down that irrepressible need to let an entire river of tears that I've been hardly holding back for the last hour or so to just stream down my cheeks, hoping that it's salty liquid could magically wash away the shame and humiliation of seeing that from his beautiful, one of a kind Princess for which he was capable of turning to ashes an entire army without a second thought had I asked him that, my patron God is treating me worse than the cheapest tramps one could find in the most ill famed Athenian taverns.

As if reading my mind, sensing my affliction and my heart breaking apart, it's not long before he bends over me, kissing my back and my shoulders, letting me feel his hot breath on my skin, teasingly brushing his lips softly along my still aching spine, covering every single bruise with feather like caresses, cruelly messing with my head, showing me what I've lost, managing to only intensify the indescribable agony and the screams of my soul.

If this is not torture, I don't know what is...

I don't get to finish my thought though, that the following second he brings me back to reality, letting his fingers dig deep into my waist like claws, as if wanting to drill holes insides my flesh, and we're back to square one, with me groaning in pain as he draws me closer to him, spreading my legs even wider, lifting me up a bit for better access, finding an almost steady rhythm to his thrusts, and, despite myself, as he begins hammering from the right angle, I suddenly feel a very special kind of fever spreading inside me, like a disease, making me burn inside out, getting more and more intense with every sharp, vicious jerk.

"You like this?" his voice breaks out right out of nowhere, so distant as if it were coming from the other end of the world, and I don't even bother answering him, every single part of my body now way too focused on the incredible wave of pleasure building in between my thighs.

I must be going crazy, I know, but, the sound of his irregular breathing on the background along with the low groans escaping involuntarily from the back of his throat only make my body shudder, imperceptibly at first and, as my muscles start gripping tighter and tighter against his shaft, the fact that I'm enjoying myself is impossible to deny.

"Mmmmmmm... " I can't help grunting audibly, my vision more and more blurry with each pump, dragging me fast towards the frantic climax that I've been expecting ever since I felt his fingers inside me earlier today...The waiting is getting unbearable, and, as one of his hands moves cunningly underneath my belly and further down to my clit, beginning to expertly rub it up and down with short steady strokes, my lungs nearly explode, unable to hold the cries that escape my lips with the speed of sound.

"Feeling good...?"

"Oh Gods!...Yes!" The phrase leaves my mouth without the slightest restriction, without even realizing what I'm saying...

The truth is that I can't get myself to believe how incredibly amazing all this feels and I almost can't take the pleasure any more, I'm seconds away from cumming when, all of a sudden, no warning what so ever, he slids out of me, grabbing a handful of my hair instead, wrapping it around his fist, and before I manage to understand what he's doing, he's pulling me roughly back on my feet and all I can still fell right now is that ripping, discomforting sensation of strands being plucked from my scalp the instant he starts pulling my head back even more, until between my back and his chest there's no more than a hair's width.

"Are you close to begging right now? he whispers ironically nibbling on my earlobe while his hand keeps on rubbing my impossibly swollen, tingling clit, and I can feel the slickness of my own juices trailing down my thigh when his fingers slowly move towards my soaked, dripping slit, entering me again, tauntingly massaging my inner walls, shifting to my G spot again...driving me up the walls...my own hips betraying me, rocking on his fingers, gasping and trashing at each dazzling sensation...

All this time, I can feel his hard rock cock pulsating against my as cheeks, and I'm desperately trying to bend down, to have it inside me again, but he doesn't allow it, he 's just forcing me to stand, keeping me there, almost glued to him while still fingering me, my heart drumming so hard that I can actually hear it , my nipples so erect that I'm surprised even myself to see them like this...It's not enough though, and the need to feel him again is growing unbearable.

"When you decide that you can't take it anymore, you know what you have to do..." he murmurs, brushing my clit one more time on his way out of me, moving his hand to my breasts, fondling them, pinching my nipples, placing the most torturous kisses on my neck, finally letting go of my hair, and turning me around to face him, claiming my lips in what proves to be just another bruising kiss that intentionally forces one of the previous cuts he made to open up, allowing a few drops of blood to restart their path down my chin , and as I raise my hand to wipe it clean, he just stops me half way, licking it himself...By all Gods I can't remember the last time I've felt so aroused...

"So...I was just wondering..." he whispers "Are all whores as unsatisfied as you are right now, or you're just the exception to the rule?"

Hearing his cruel, humiliating line, I instantly push him away, far enough this time so that my knee can collide full force with his stomach and I'm only sorry that from the angle I'm in, I didn't succeed in aiming his crotch as planned... that would have showed him what satisfaction is all about.

"Only when they have an impotent Bastard trying to fuck them!" I retort, a glorious smile on my face, watching his face distort in pain, his hands tightly wrapped around his waist.


	6. The night's still young

6 THE NIGHT'S STILL YOUNG

It doesn't last though, my smile, for, as expected, the following second he 's already staring down at me, having knocked me off my feet, and before I can even realize what's happening, the white walls of the temple are already dissolving in front of my eyes, the blinding light of a vortex swallowing us both, taking me completely by surprise, and I can't help cursing silently this whole spinning and twisting around thing that creates this enormous void in my stomach, making me feel like I wanna throw up.

Moments later we're in a spacious, rather obscure room, and given the fact that I've just traveled with the speed of light through some dazzling bright tunnel, my eyes still need to accommodate to the dimness of the place.

No sooner do I realize -as an effort to get more information on the place that Ares has brought me to- that I'm in one of his countless fortresses, my brain starts scanning the place, and, among the first information I'm getting to process, judging by the pleasant, sleek, almost tickly sensation coming from my feet is that I'm stepping on a Persian plush rug or something strikingly similar, aka a very luxurious place, most likely some personal lair he has in the mountains of Macedonia given that he has a weakness for the damned area.

Before I realize it, I'm being brutally shoved on a bed...a large, soft bed this time a real delight compared to the rough, cold surface of that marble altar...

As I take one more furtive glance around the room, I can easily notice the distinct dark romantic style in which the walls had been adorned, and I'm just about to make a nasty comment about those royal blue candles popping up seemingly out of nowhere in the purpose of offering some extra light, when, paying no more attention at what the God is doing, I almost jump at the strange sensation that a lukewarm stream of water is pouring all over my body, defying all logic of things, cause on my skin, there's no trace of wetness...no nothing.

As I touch myself, it suddenly strikes me though: the dust from my chest and hair is completely gone, and by the time my hand reaches my right shoulder, there's this fine, satiny layer of rose oil covering me from head to toe...

Reading the puzzled look on my face, Ares, who's been staring at me all this time from the opposite side of the bed, somehow feels the need to intervene. The damned Bastard! At this point I'd love so much to stick a dagger through his heart that I can't even put it into words!

"I like my bitches clean...Plus...you were right...you still had that dickhead's smell all over you...Kinda felt like I was fucking him...It was giving me the creeps..." he quickly fills in the blanks for me.

The damned Bastard! Gods I hate him! And that irritating, nonchalant smile painted on his lips...it sickens my soul!

As I feel a new wave of rage washing over me, clouding my vision for a few seconds, I hastily grab a pillow and throw it into his face. He parrays lazily of course, and he kinda does the same with the second and with the third, until there is nothing left for me to throw, laughing his heart out at my infantile outburst...

His stupid reaction only succeds in making me even more angry, of course. I'm so furious right now that, had I been in better shape and if my body wouldn't be as weakened as it is as a result of those severe collisions with the walls, every bone in my body aching at the slightest touch, I would definitely make his neck snap in less then seconds...too bad it wouldn't kill him anyway...

My ready to slash and burn gaze attracts his attention though faster than I would have normally thought it would, and as always, he just can't put anything aside. Articulating some totally lame comment about my reaction is always a must...Can't help wanting him dead!

" Tsk tsk tsk! So much negativity! It's not good for your health doll...I'd highly advise not to waste that energy though...you'll be needing it..."

"For?" I promptly ask , a mischievous grin stretching from ear to ear. "Having you uselessly pump inside me like some horny teen for another hour or two for nothing? No thanks..."

He just arches an eyebrow, but I'm not blind. I can see what my words are doing to him...pretty much the same what his are doing to me...the worst thing about it though is that I can't tell if he's just messing with my mind or if that's how he sees me right now...a common slut...That's eating me alive...

"Still frustrated I see...I don't blame you...but don't worry...by the time I'm through with you, there's an entire legion of men guarding these gates- in desperate need for a "diversion"...At least one of them could satisfy your complex set of needs, I'm sure..."

"Well...You certainly look like you could need some help..." I reply disgusted by his attitude, part of me silently wondering if he hates me to that extent that the idea of having to lower that much in order to teach me a lesson wouldn't represent a problem to him any longer...

"Really?" he inquires seductively, moving slowly my way, and he's standing now just inches away from me. I don't even flinch. I'm hardly breathing though, trying to outguess his reaction...

With a gentle but firm shove, to which I don't even try to resist-the pain in my spine literally killing me- he's pushing me on my back, and I almost can't believe that despite the ripping pain striking even the last nerve in my brain, I'm actually feeling a slick, warm trail trickling down my thighs at the mere idea that he's going to touch me again...

With infinite, obviously dissimulated care this time, he leans over me, without allowing our bodies to touch nonetheless, to rub against one another , propping himself up on his arms and only faintly brushing his lips against my neck, teasing me, descending torturously slow towards my breasts, lustfully licking my nipples, making me hold my breath, and, try as I might, I can't hold back a very wanting moan from escaping my lips the instant I suddenly feel his cock pressing on my stomach...

I'm biting my tongue hard but it's too late...

As both of my hands reach up, attempting to somehow prevent his weight from crushing my chest under his own, inflicting even more pain that I already feel , one of his hands moves further down to inspect the wetness that he already knows it's there- after that almost orgasmic round we've just shared and that he cruelly decided to interrupt, for the second time that night just to teach me a lesson, how could it even be otherwise?

For Zeus sake, at this point I think I could come by simply inhaling his perfume.

As if having heard my thoughts, he smirks sarcastically, clearly wanting to prove a point, and without warning the blood starts racing through my veins again, my breathing becoming more and more labored.

It's like he's seeing right through me, as if I'm made out of glass and he can locate even the most well hidden secrets in the furtest corners of mi mind, no matter how deep inside the brain they are buried.

"...Hmmmm...you were saying...?"

I'm eyeing him angrily again, ready to smack him big time, straight in the face, making abstraction of the new wave of physical agony I just know he'd make use of just for the sheer pleasure of humiliating me even more ...

"What would it take, Xena? ...One, two thrusts?"

As my fist is about to connect with his face though, he expertly grabs my wrist, no effort about it what so ever, his iron grip forcing my fingers to open, and, eying me mockingly this whole time, he just begins planting a few long, salacious kisses on my arm, silently throwing in my face a discreet but stingy enough reproach under the form of that traditional "You never learn" expression- given the fact that I have tried that move one more time that night-without success of course, much to my dismay.

Noticing the frustration playing on my features, he just bursts into a bemused laughter, letting go of my hand, and slowly sinking lower, making his way in between my legs, still grinning like an idiot at the thought of what was going to happen next.

I'm just watching him, still contemplating my options, wondering if hitting him now straight in the head with something would quench that unspeakable thirst of hurting him, but all my thoughts seam to transform into utter nothingness as I can feel his breath, so indescribably hot on my skin and that strange, unmistakable tension in the pit of my stomach growing stronger and stronger, and a light tremor seizes my body in anticipation.

He's not touching me yet though, not the way that'd I'd like him to, he's just superficially brushing my clit with his thumb as he had done it countless times tonight, hardly a caress, but enough to make every single muscle of my body tense and my back arch, rising visibly towards him, while a stream of impossible to control, arousing vibrations spread throughout my squirming from.

I'm looking at him...he's looking back at me too, smiling coldly, analyzing my every reaction, acting as if he has all the time in the wolrd...no rush, his hands focusing now on my inner thighs, as well as his lips ...Gods ...

Right out of nowhere though, the moment his soft tongue starts dancing around my overly sensitive clit, gently biting and sucking it, sending a million shivers throughout my system and simultaneously making goosebumps erupt all over my skin, a new idea starts clinging onto my mind...

Why don't we change roles ? Just for a little while? If you wanna play rough, I'm perfectly fine with it...it's high time I wipe that smugness off your face, making you loose some of that self control a bit too don't you think? It would certainly make things more interesting, I silently tell myself, a cattish smile on my face, as I let my hands reach down to his shoulders, arching my back a little more, enough for him to notice, letting out the dirtiest moan I am capable off.

And there it is...all that damned detachment and imperiousness going down the drain along with that glacial smile frozen on the surface of his lips...And for a second there, I almost think I can read the sadness in his eyes again, the disappointment... almost a grey shade of humanity I guess ...

Sadly, it only lasts a couple of seconds, cause before I get to enjoy it properly, planning my next move that should have rocked his world big time , he just chuckles bemusedly:

"Hey! No cheating! Play fair...Plus, even the lousiest whore I had was able to fake a moan better..."

"Oh...she needed to fake? Well that explains a lot!" I bark back at him, proud to hit him where it hurt the most: in his immeasurable ego.

"Yeah...only because she couldn't take it any more...she was pretty much drained and I was still in the mood!"

Hearing him brag like that only makes me even angrier. Damned Bastard, having the nerve to brag about the women he'd screwed just to get even ? Like I'd ever be jealous of some cheap, horny tramp...!

I take a deep breath...I can't help it though...The mere thought of him having pleasured any woman the way he has done me all of these years...I know just how good he must have made her feel...

One well calculated, powerful blow in his mid section is all it takes to push him off me, sending him flying to the center of the room, thus blowing up some serious steam...

"That was low..." he simply states, rising from the floor, and , as I see that evil flicker inside his eyes again, I know he's up to no good. I'm instantly trying to get up and flip to the opposite side of the bed...Something seams to be holding me back though...

"You sick Son of a Bitch!" I snap at him instantly, roaring like a beast the minute I notice the black silk restraints around my hands, keeping me in place.

"...I swear you should see yourself! You look so incredibly seductive all tied up like that...You could even try struggling a bit, just for effect, you know...?

"You 're a Pig!" I exclaim from the top of my lungs, unable to control myself.

"And you should mind that language babe, or I'm afraid I'll have to spank you a couple of times, too! "he replies jokingly, whilst carefully covering his visage again with that protective phlegmatic expression that I just can't stand seeing, and, no matter how hard I'm trying to avoid it, I can't help feeling hurt and offended by way in which he's patronizing me , treating me like some toy that he owns and which has no real value in fact, being only used for diversion.

I don't say anything, I just sneer back at him, throwing a contemptuous gaze his way, while my arms are still struggling to get free .

A cynical smile later, and he's casually lying next to me, and judging by his smile, he's enjoying every bit of what he's doing...Another rough pull and, ignoring the pain in my wrists, I'm almost there, happy to know that it's but a matter of seconds till I'll be hitting him so hard that he 'll be wishing he never met me...

As the tip of his fingers begins drawing some intricate, invisible patterns around my navel, distracting me temporarily from my new supreme goal, our gazes suddenly meet again, and I can see him licking his lips, biting incitingly slow his lower one, and for some curious, unknown reason I can't manage to unglue my eyes from his mouth, it's like I'm bewitched to spy on his every move, igniting inside me the unrestrainable desire to feel that soft tongue of his darting inside my portal...

Right out of nowhere though, as his eyebrow arches inquiringly, his hand just stops, allowing his palm to rest flat on my stomach and for a brief moment there, it seams like the time itself refuses to flow anymore and from the instant he leans over me till the one in which he grabs my wrists, leaning even more, his lips so close to mine that I can almost feel their ever so smooth surface touching my own, it seams like an eternity has passed...

Gods, I want his to kiss me so much that I can feel the taste of him on the tip of my tongue...

"Is silk too soft for your exquisite tastes?" he murmurs gravely, obviously without the slightest intention to fulfill that secret whish floating on the surface of my moons, wish that by now he has more than deciphered, I'm sure.

My brain way to busy with synchronizing my lungs to inhale his every breath, I offer him no answer and suddenly, as if waking up from I dream, I realize he was referring to the almost loosen scarfs which he had used to pin me to the bed, and when I try to pull again, my body fighting beneath his to escape his grasp , he firmly grips my chin with his other hand, brutally squeezing my cheeks together and continuing to whisper calmly:

"I woudn't do that if I were you...You might just hurt yourself..."

The instant he removes his hand from my face, I look up and can barely suppress a loud, disapproving exclamation from leaving my throat...there's a new set of handcuffs around my wrists.- and their interior is made out of sharp, extremely sharp blades meant to graze or cut at any sudden, move.

"You twisted perverse! I don't even know what surprises me the most: you being such a psychotic maniac, or the idea that I actually spent almost ten years of my life with you!"

"Take your pick" he simply answers, dusting off his hands in theatrical satisfaction as he gets off the bed, and heading towards what appears to be a wooden table, leaving me there to just eye him like a hawk, wondering what he's planning in that sick mind of his.

"What are you doing?"

He smirks brazenly again, tilting his head quizzically:

"Getting impatient? Just pouring myself some wine...I'm a bit...thirsty...Want some?

"No thanks...I've heard it does wonders solving erectile problems though, so you can drink an extra glass, just in case." I start stinging him worse than a wasp.

" Well...I don't really think that would be much of a problem..." he promptly makes a point looking down at his 10 inch rock solid shaft and back at me again, taking a long sip of the flavory crimson liquid filling the goblet, leaning on the edge of the window, gazing wistfully towards the sky, and all I can think of is how much I hate this mind games he's playing with me.

"I hate you..." the words suddenly leave my lips, so naturally that they take even myself by surprise.

"No you don't...not yet...But hey, the night's still young!... Pretty soon you'll have all the reasons in the world too." And as he finishes his sentence, the previously mentioned idea of him actually allowing his men to rape me begins to seriously take shape in my head for the first time that night...No...he wouldn't...

As if reading my thoughts, he just starts laughing disdainfully again.

Seconds later he's heading towards the large leather sofa positioned not far from where he's standing , a spot from which we can see each other perfectly, his gaze never leaving my own, always watching me in the eyes, obsessed about reading my reactions, about decoding every single shade passing on their now drained, troubled surface, and I'm almost on the verge of cursing this treacherous body that unavoidably seams to start reacting again under the effect of his fiery gaze, when his voice diverts my attention again.

"You are so beautiful..."

"And you really need help..."

"Me? I'm not the one chained to the bed, blades grazing my wrists and all that..."

"My point's exactly!"

"Right...Guards!" his voice suddenly thunders, making my entire body swictch on extreme alert mood.

As three men storm inside the room, their lecherous stares instantly fix on me, he clicks his tongue playfully, and it feels like I'm sitting on pins and needles.

"Yes Lord Ares!" on of them answers submissively bowing his head.

"Boys...this might just be your lucky night..." he states , making some more wine appear in his now almost empty goblet.

The men just eye him curiously. He then points out casually towards the bed.

All three heads turn promptly my way.

"Do you like what you see?" he's asking, stroking his gotee lightly.

"Yeah"

"Sure"

"How could we not?" they all mumble in unison.

"Perfect...cause that's exactly what you'll get..."


	7. Twisting the knife

**7 TWISTING THE KNIFE**

And, with no further notice, it seems like that's all he needed to say for the biggest, dirtiest grins to instantly be projected on those disgusting idiot's faces, idiots who on the other hand have already begun to take off their armors, throwing down their weapons as if in a race of who gets to be first.

Watching them, I'm just trying to remain as passive and calm as possible, avoiding any possible reaction that could give that Bastard the satisfaction of seeing me panic in any way, determined to offer him a show that he won't forget soon, one that doesn't actually involve those three soap dodger's cocks plunging inside me.

As I prepare at least a few effective scenarios in my mind through which, with my legs alone I should be able to send them to Hades's realm faster than they can blink, I can feel Ares' eyes upon me, scanning meticulously my face in search of any sign of distress, and in return, I just turn my head his way and smirk defiantly, letting him know that he could as well have en entire army raping me, for, at the end of the day, when all this is over, I will just hate him with every fiber of my being whilst his momentarily satisfaction will diminish with every passing thrust and climax of those horny scumbags- and that's a fact.

"Whoa there !" their captain's voice- the only one out of the three who hasn't bugged an inch- suddenly thunders, raising his hand firmly, stopping the other two guards from taking another item off, casting them such a harsh gaze that they are barely breathing right now.

"But... Lord Ares said..."

"Do you really have cocks instead of brains inside your skulls?" he yells at them in revolt, hitting one of them in the stomach so hard that he instantly falls at his feet.

"I'm sure that Lord Ares didn't mean that as literally as you'd want him to" he adds, turning towards the War God and bowing his head again respectfully.

"Well Miklos, I'm surprised...You're smarter than you look" the God replies thoughtfully while still stroking his beard, an expression of utter content on his face. "Kill these dumb asses" he the orders to the captain pointing towards the other two guards.

In less then a second, before those unfortunate losers even manage to pick their sword from the floor and get the chance to defend themselves , Miklos has already sliced their throats, wiping his blade clean against their dead bodies. Quite impressive I might add.

"Is there anything else I can do for you My Lord?" he politely inquires, again, without looking the God in the eyes.

"Yes, as a matter of fact there is..." Ares retorts, licking his lips in total satisfaction, the smell of blood and his captain's prompt, submissive reaction apparently brightening up his day faster than he himself would have expected. "First of all dispose of these useless bodies and then bring Airlia to me...After that, you're free for the night, go to the village, find yourself a few hot wanton babes , have some fun, get laid or something..."

"Yes Lord Ares, thank you"

Another bow and Miklos is out the door, heading like a good little puppy for the Priestesses' quarters to fulfill his master's order.

"Had a change of heart, Ares?" I sneer, glaring daggers his way.

"More like I got an idea..." he replies chuckling mischievously, seeing that with this little improvisation he has successfully managed to throw me completely out balance, a visible sparkle of curiosity in my eyes letting him know that I don't have the slightest clue about what he is trying to pull.

As my eyes shift to the ceiling now, stubbornly refusing to cast as much as one more gaze towards the Bastrad's over confident persona, letting him stare at me like a freikin' Lunatic until his eyeballs pop out of his head, I'm silently wondering what in Tartarus was I thinking when I decided that I needed to see him in the first place. Gods know I should have let him rot in pain...

I can hear him pour another glass of wine somewhere in the background now, and, shaking my head disapprovingly at his apparent intention of numbing whatever is left of his feelings seems to be a reflex that kinda comes with the territory. My attention is nonetheless rapidly diverted by the sound of the door cracking open, revealing the form of a medium height priestess, dressed in read and black robes, walking timidly towards the center of the room.

"I understood you wanted to see me My Lord?"

"I wouldn't call it precisely **seeing**" the nonchalant line leaves his lips while analyzing the young girl's body from head to toe, with the naughtiest gaze one could think of, throwing the goblet over his shoulder as if it's somehow interfering with whatever he is about to do, and, raising gallantly from the sofa he meets her half way, taking her hand into his and placing a warm kiss on it's back.

The girl just smiles in delight, her lips parting slightly the instant he extends his other hand to caress her face, and if it weren't for that irritating semi- obscurity, I could almost swear that her cheeks had turned crimson under the effect of his soft touch and of that impossibly to neglect image of his perfectly sculpted, naked body...

"I've missed you" the words leave his manipulative, snake like mouth the very moment his hand moves to cup her chin, lifting gently her head up, watching her just like a beast would watch it's pray before jumping at it's throat to attack and devour it bit by bit, and to my unspeakable disgust she's just starring at him in utter amazement for what seams like forever, her eyes wide open and a picturesque smile playing on her childish lips.. So innocent ans still...so stupid...

She's just slowly dying to feel him , barely breathing now while she's waiting for him to say something else, anything, or better yet, to do something.

He doesn't seem to wanna let the lady wait to much either, and, the instant he gets one step closer , he leisurely moves his fingers towards her shoulders, making her robes and the rest of her clothes magically fall at her feet, his dark brown moons never leaving her own all this time, and for God's sake I can hear her gasp loudly, as his teeth begin nibbling on her earlobe, murmuring softly into her ear words that I can't fully understand...

"Oh come on!" I can't help exclaiming with mock peevishness, rolling my eyes in complete disbelief. "So this is your big plan? Fucking some sluty priestess just out of that trampled manly pride to settle the score? Well what can I say? Enjoy the ride!"

He doesn't bother to reply of course, acting as if I'm not even in the room, but I distinctly hear him whisper something against that airheaded chick's ear, and, to my boundless irritation, she's just giggling ridiculously dumb in return, making me wanna rise from the bed and slit her throat.

If only I could...

While I keep on oscillating between adding something else to my previous outburst or just feign complete and unstirred placidity, he starts kissing her, and there's so much possessiveness and hunger in that kiss that between the moment of gritting my teeth and the one of literally screaming in rage and frustration there's just one insignificant millisecond.

They're on the sofa now, with him on top, caressing, kissing and licking every inch of her body, and I instantly turn my head the other way of course, refusing to watch them any further, and definitely refusing to walk straight into his trap by allowing him to emotionally torment and scar me according to plan...

_"I don't care about this...any of this. He could as well fuck all his obtuse dolls in a row and I still wouldn't give a damn. He's just a fucking Bastard and a Moron to whom I made the terrible mistake of giving my heart . But he's not worth it. Not at all." _the words keep replaying in my head like a deafening echo, but the positive attitude doesn't seem to be of much help...

For some awkward reason, I can't shut off her voice...the need cascading like a stream from within her and then his muffled groans as he first enters her, the smell of sex, the sounds of their sweaty bodies slamming against one another...I can't help myself, and as if I have no more control over my body, my head is slowly turning, my eyes following their intricate ballet again, my heart breaking to pieces with each and every thrust, with each and every moan...

As tears start streaming down my visage, I'm biting my lips again, as hard as I can this time, and despite the knowledge that neither the pain nor that metallic taste of fresh claret from my mouth wouldn't be able to stop those inner flames from turning my soul into ashes, I simply do it, harder and harder.

Slowly, agonizingly, he's driving me crazy, and the sight of his palms caressing her light brown skin, pretty much equals to me with rubbing not salt but pure poison on an open wound...

One hour? Two?...I can't really tell how much time has passed by now, but I do know that there is nothing left inside me except for the broken walls of a clay vessel that has been gradually filled with suffering, jealousy, humiliation, frustration, spite, remorse, helplessness and hate just to be emptied again during their last climax, leaving behind but an indescribable void that I just know I could never refill with anything...

"Airlia, my darling, we should see more of each other!" his merry voice breaks out as clear as a bell, slapping her behind while she's bending to reach out for her clothes, ready to leave-or at least that's what she intended right before he roughly pulled her back again for a ferocious kiss that only twists the knife in my wound even more.

"Have a good night My Lord" she murmurs lovingly once they pull apart and if that affectionate tone in her voice couldn't make me tear the heart from her chest than nothing could.

"Oh, trust me, I most certainly will!" he replies with a grin while winking at me implyingly .


	8. Shadows

**8 SHADOWS**

As soon as Airilia is out the door, I'm walking towards the bed, where my pretty little Princess is lying, her face turned away from me, and, judging by her deadly silence and by the tension floatting in the air, this hasn't been as fun for her as it was for me...Good...I'm rather pleased to see that everything is going as planned and that my efforts of giving her a taste of her own medicine are finally paying off.

"How's it goin' doll? Are you enjoying yourself thus far?" I exclaim mockingly against her lips while grabbing her hair and turning her head so that I can see her eyes. They are closed, but they unexpectedly flutter open the second I wipe away a fresh trail of tears from her left cheek, letting her know that I've noticed them.

There's no answer of course; no loss either as I wasn't expecting one anyway, so I decide to wait a bit before adding another comment, as the sight of her irritated, red moons kinda gives me a very distinct and rare feeling of satisfaction... an almost spiritual orgasm if you will...Absolutely invigorating!

"You know..." I whisper murderously soft against her lips, brushing them lightly in the form of such a delicate kiss that I can barely feel it physically, but the tension of which equals the effect of any of those violent ones that have bruised her lips earlier tonight "...there's no need for you to be jealous or anything, I mean, with that girlie...it was...pure fun, nothing more..." I end the phrase, unable to hold back another mischievous smile- not that I've tried to in the first place-when I feel her breathing kicking up a notch.

She doesn't flinch a muscle though. She's way too angry and hurt to do it- Tartarus, she even gave up struggling a while ago...But I can see it, I'm too accustomed with reading her like an open book, as if her life were my favorite story, so that I actually miss out on such important details like that unmistakable shade of agony floating on the surface of her statuesque visage...There's so much suffering underneath that lifeless mask she has deliberately chosen to put on, that blood starts flowing faster through my veins with only looking at her.

She refuses to speak, yes, but her jaw tenses instead, and judging by those razor sharp daggers that her baby blues are now throwing at my neck, I could as well pat myself on the back for having managed to slash her heart so deep to the point that she can no longer control her reactions...That lousy attempt of feigning indifference is long gone...

Consequently, I'd pretty much say it's time for me to take this to the next level...Time to stuff that whole Hercules affair down her throat big time...and what better way to do that than kissing and biting her neck here and there, while murmuring lowly against her ear everything I want her to know...

When the words start flowing from my mouth though, despite the fact that I'd like them to cut through flesh and bone, they don't manage to sound as jagged and scornful as I had initially wanted them too...

"And wanna hear what's even funnier?" I restart, frustration and bitterness reverberating out of every word. " I really loved you...I did...But I will screw a thousand Priestesses if I have to in order to erase the memory of you from my heart...heck, I'll rip it out if that's what it takes, it's already a couple of eons old anyway, and I'd hate to end up dead of godly stroke, you know?

But you... you, Sweetheart, not even in death you wouldn't be able to shut off that damned connection you have with me, for my name has been engraved on the very essence of your soul the instant you pledged yourself to me, worshiping my name...Just humour me and try picturing the scene a little bit, will you? To Hades' realms and back, I will be forever inisde you, burning like a flame that you could never extinct, missing me...wanting me by your side...begging for my presence...praying to all Gods for oblivion...for complete and absolute forgetfulness, while, on the other hand, here on Earth, I'll have another Chosen, another little obsession , a new doll to play with...I only need to curse and kill you in order to get this done with...The pain inflicted by such damnation is said to be excruciating...unbearable for any mortal...I wouldn't even have to stain my sword with your blood...Just stand back and enjoy the show...Quite ironic don't you think?"

"So do it already! Come on! Do it!" she finally breaks out, her body trashing under my weight, challenging me beyond limits. " What are you waiting for Ares? If you really hate me that much what's holding you back huh? Is it by any chance godly intuition ? You can't kill me can you? No...no you can't because simply sticking a blade into my chest wouldn't actually ease in any way the frustration of knowing that your mongrel brother, your number one nightmare has managed to make a mockery out of those ten long years of hard work in which you did your beast to annihilate even the last trace of humanity left in me so that I could serve your purposes properly, am I right? And all that in just a matter of hours... stealing your precious Princess from right under your nose... Your pride and joy! Your trophy!...Well... put a poultice on it. It's gotta sting!..."

...I hate it when I walk into my own trap, I really do, especially when I'm perfectly aware of the stunt that she's trying to pull, but this is too much! I can't take this any more, I don't want to...As she very well put it ...what am I waiting for?

Thus, before she can get the chance to spit some more venom out that fiery mouth of hers, a dagger materializes into my hand , the vividly colored image of the blade heading straight towards her heart with the speed of light and making that luscious body of hers drown in blood - the same treacherous blood for which I would have moved heaven and earth- spinning inside my head like a roundabout, tempting me beyond measure.

She more then deserves to die...She betrayed me, hurt me, mocked me in every possible way, and at the end of the day she's nothing but a worthless whore that could be rapidly replaced by any other similar cunt ready for action, maybe even a more gullible one this time.

But then again, there's this need , this undeniable, impossibly to erase or get out of my system need to loose myself in the crystal blue sea of her eyes and to hear that irregular drumming of her heart whenever I reach out to touch her skin...Plus, that arousing expression of her face when even the last corner of her body is invaded by ecstasy while we're making love...it's like a drug, it's addictive, I can't live without it...

Shaking my head vigurously, I lift my gaze back up to meet hers and, much to my surprise, I can see the mask falling apart bit by bit from her face, as, involuntarily, new bright teardrops leave the surface of her half closed eyes, and Fates know that despite the hate, the yells and the poison spilling from our words, the sight of her hurting like this and that immesurable sadness in her eyes is driving me insane. What in Hades' name is wrong with me? One minute I'd rip out her heart with my bare hands and the other I'd fuck her brains out...Gods damn this woman! I can't love her, I can't let her go, and I definitely can't get myself to kill her...And to top it all, my temples are throbbing as if I had one hundred Spartan chariots racing round and round my brain. It feels like seconds from exploding!

As I lean in to kiss her, at the same time wiping away the salty liquid trailing down her lips I speak again, above a whisper this time, subtly tracing a fine line up and down her jugular with the point of the dagger, right before releasing her hands from those awfully tight restraints:

"You will beg, scream my name and tell me you love me, even if I have to cut this body into little pieces and feed it to the dogs, do you you undersatnd me, Xena?

"Love you? Scream your name? What's wrong with you Ares? Have those previous orgasms affected your brain ? I'd rather die before letting you touch me again, you sicken me!" she screams in my face, trying to push me off her, and in no time we're like a rabid lion and a hysterical lioness, fiercely jumping at each other's throat, fighting for dominion, with her still struggling to break free- being still uncomfortably pinned under the weight of my body- and definitely gaining ground before I cunningly manage to seize her lips into another ferocious kiss that seemingly keeps her put long enough for me to calm her down a bit.

An unanticipated roar of exasperation leaves my throat nonetheless the second I pull back and she attempts a direct head blow straight to my forehead. It's all it takes to make me blow up...And these lines I'm spitting out...I can hardly belive I'm uttering them myself...

" Will you cut it out already?! What are you doing to me? I love you Gods damn it! Can't you see that? I love you like crazy, I can't fucking live without you! I see your face everywhere, and you can play " Let's Pretend" as much as you want, feigning that you don't care anymore about any of this and that you're only here to lick my wounds, but we both know that there's more to the story! I know you remember? It's so obvious that you love me too and that you're hurting like shit just like I am ! Why in Tartarus did you have to screw everything up huh? Hercules?! Out of all people? What were you thinking Xena...what were you thinking? "


	9. Power, domination and a fucking map

**9 POWER, DOMINATION AND A FUCKING MAP**

As I look deep inside his eyes , I can easily read the pain and the confusion nesting there. He could never understand though...He's way too hurt and obsessed with me to have the slightest clue about why I chose to do things the way I did... He's War, the Spirit of Battle and Bloodshed combined...**loss **and **defeat **aren't even real terms in his vocabulary, just like the concept of me making my own choices for once, without requesting at least formally his permission or consent, is ...

"What do you want me to say Ares? That I'm sorry? That it was all a big misunderstanding ... a... mistake ? That what you saw was nothing but a bad dream and that everything would go away in the morning? What do you want from me? " I ask huskily, finally managing to push him off me.

"An explanation for Zeus sake! I'd say I deserve that much! I need to understand!"

"Well you can't blame me for not having tried now can you? " I restart, anger and revolt reverberating from my every word. How dare he? "As I well recall I came here hours ago telling you that I wanted us to talk but you were so blinded with rage that you could barely resist the urge to blast me to pieces...so you wisely decided that fucking me was a bit better than jabbering...! And now you're suddenly demanding for an explanation? What's wrong ? Why the sudden change of heart? "

As I'm waiting for an answer I'm pretty sure that the one I'm about to receive is as equally caustic as my long charade of poisonous questions.

"Don't play the Hestian Virgin routine with me Xena cause Gods know it's not the best approach right now...You explicitly asked for it- I gave you the chance to leave- not once, but twice- and you refused- You wanted it as much as I did and we both know that was the next best option instead of strangling you with my bare hands, which is still itching by the way, so please, stop testing my patience any more...Don't push it...And if you still feel like chit chatting this would be a good time to start..."

"Have you been listening to anything I said to you earlier today at the temple? Anything at all? "

"What? When?... Before Hercules? That whole redemption crap? Saving the innocent? Are you out of your mind Xena? "

Just as I thought...He could never understand...And I don't actually blame him for that...he has the essence of Violence and Death inside him, after all...how could he? It's worth a shot though...Maybe, just maybe...he'd open up his heart and try to look at things from my angle for a chnage.

"Why ever not?! Ares...I'll still get to do what I do best, I 'll still use everything you taught me...still fighting for a better world..."

He cuts me off in mid phrase, his previously confused stare gradually shaping into something else...**revolt.**..

"Fighting for a better world?! By putting a few lousy thieves in jail? By killing a bunch of local warlords and two Cyclops at some crossroad just like my mongrel brother? Would you listen to yourself for a minute?! How would that shape the face of the planet, huh Princess? "

" Not everything is reduced to reshaping the face of the planet Ares! Not everything is about force and power and domination and a fucking map! There's more to life than that!"

" Yes there is! There's also justice, order, comfort , normality, **peace** if you will!" he yells at me stressing the key word. " How are you planning to obtain that without an army at your disposal?"

"You're talking about peace through slaughter, Ares! " and I genuinely feel my heart breaking to pieces as I see the expression on his face...

" Are you kidding me? Haven't you learnt anything at all during almost a decade by my side? A good ruler's most effective weapon is his reputation! He needs to be able to inspire fear and respect at the same time. Fear and respect means order in the ranks of your men and in the lands that you've conquered. Order is peace. Peace brings comfort and prosperity. And all this leads to a happy happy secure and strong nation! Isn't that what you've wanted? I've gave that to you! I laid the world at your feet, Xena!"

"I did want that...Ares...I did...It's just that..."

"...What? Does roaming about the country, chasing wild geese beat leading the most powerful army the world has ever seen with the God of War himself by your side? " he trails off and his tone is not only the one of a man perplexed by what he's hearing but also of a one completely disappointed and helpless one in front of a problem bigger than the land of Chin. "Xena...you are my Chosen! This is your destiny! Unless I'm mistaken here and you'd actually settle for a pitiful, ordinary life just like any of these stinky mortals do each they of thier useless existence, that is!"

"Stop twisting my words! It doesn't have to be like that...It's not like I'll be living at a farm raising pigs and milking cows Ares! I'd be fighting!"

"Fighting..." he sneers disgusted by the thought. "...bandits and evildoers. Right. Gotcha. "

He pauses awhile, inhales deeply, looks down and back up at me again, biting his lower lips nervously.

"...So...what's wrong with the whole leading my armies picture, cause I still can't see it clearly...What's the problem? Is it ...the color of the flags? The...the tents? You don't like the sword type anymore? What? Whatever it is we can change it..."

"Don't you dare patronize me! "

"Well what would you have me doing? Sympathize with your cause? Take out my sword and go chase some maggots together? Have some one on one quality time cooking some rabbit in the middle of nowhere? Huh?!"

"I don't know what I'd like you to do! I wouldn't expect you of all people to understand my decision ok? It's just that...the blood, the crimes, the continuous screaming of those poor people I've tortured and mutilated echoing inside my head..."

"What are you talking about Xena? That's impossible! Each night I made sure that Morpheus sent you only positive, constructive dreams. With fairytale images and all..."

"How about the daytime Ares? Can Morpheus cover that too? My guilty conscience...where are those damned fairytale images when I most need them, cause there's certainly no fantasy involved when children are being left orphans because of me Ares, because of what I do? How many wives have lost their husbands? How many mothers will never see their sons again? And for what? For a noble purpose that neither my own troops can bare to understand?!"

He's obviously having a hard time coping with my new vision on reality and on the world. Running a hand through his hair, he's just staring blankly for a second or two before answering :

"War is War Xena! And in times of War the notion of crime is no longer valid! There are no victims on a battlefield, ok? No fathers, no sons, no husbands, no boyfriends no nothing! There are only winners and losers... The dead and the living! That pretty much sums it up! As for your troops they worship you! Those men would go to the pits of Tartarus and back if you ordered them to! You're a legend! By Zeus I wouldn't even be surprised if one day I'd wake up and found out that people are no longer building me temples because they 're too busy worshipping you! Without the ambrosia and without the Olympian blood, you are already a Goddess. Your greatness has no limits...Xena...you are beyond this mortal gutter and you know it...When I offered you a place by my side..."

"Don't even go there Ares! Don't !" I instantly stop him, shaking my head disaprovingly, the mere idea raking me up so hard that I can barely hold back the tears.

"Why? Why not? Because of Hercules?"

"What happened with Hercules was out of gratitude, ok? There is nothing there, maybe a sparkle of affection, Ares, but that's it..." I

"Gratitude...You...umm...slept...with that weasel out of gratitude? So ...let me see if I've got this straight: is this the way in which people generally express their appreciation? 'Cause if that's true, I swear I should spend more time amongst mortals...To Tartarus with Hades' Elysian Fields since your terrestrial Paradise has free access any time...Gratitude Xena? You mean a simple thanks and at most a kiss on the cheek to cover that kinky affection thing too, wouldn't have been enough?"

"Stop playing jealous already, it's so not the case!"

"Jealous? I'm not jealous Xena! I'm hurt, ok? My damned heart is burning worse than Tartarus! Disappointed! Heck, I'm even surprised if you will!"

There's a long thick silence again. I don't really know what else to say...

"For all it's worth...I am sorry for having hurt you like this...I had no right and Ares trust me, it was not my intention...It started with a kiss and I think it just got out of hand...I don't know...I'm sorry..."

"Got out of hand and accidentally entered your..."

He doesn't finish the sentence though. He refuses to say it...He just swallows hard and in less than a blink he's fully dressed again.

"Anyway...I can't talk to you right now, Xena , can you understand this? Just...just go... If I can drop you anywhere, just tell me, I'll even locate that dumbass for you if that's what you ...want..."

By the time he finishes his monologue he has already turned his back on me...He doesn't even want to look me in the eyes anymore...The pain embeded on his face probably doesn't allow him to.

"No...I think I'll stay here...I like the ambiance..." I reply in a steely voice..

"Fine suit yourself...If there's anything you need, the priestesses are at your beck and call.." He replies coldly shrugging his shoulders, and I can instantly tell that calling him under any circumstance isn't in fact an option.

Before I know it he's gone, and there's a black silk negligee covering my body... I can finally let all that pain out my chest, and as tears start rolling again down my cheeks, I can no longer hold back the sobs biting at the back my throat to finally break free ...


	10. Playing it safe

**10 PLAYING IT SAFE...**

As the darkness of the night hours is slowly melting into the first rays of dawn, I'm watching her sleep, contemplating those perfectly sculpted features that have entranced me from the very first moment I saw her in battle, chaining my soul and holding it captive all this time, without the slightest intention of setting it free ever again.

Untill but a few minutes before, I genuinely thought that something might have changed overnight, but it hasn't...it never could, I just love her too damn much for anything to ever change between us...She's sucking the life out of me , killing me bit by bit, that much of the story is true, and there's nothing I'd like more than to literally mop the floor with her one day , taking retribution for every defiance and insult she has uttered along the way, without feeling the slightest regret or remorse what so ever ... But right now I can't...Not when my feelings for her are so strong that I'd wipe out the entire mortal and immortal race from the face of the earth just to keep her safe...

'Sounds pretty lame, and it actually is, I won't deny that, but what everybody seems to forget most of the time when it comes to me is that I have never opened my heart to anyone in eons of existence...Feeling all warm and fuzzy inside isn't really part of my job description you know? It's not like I can full around massacring entire cities with one hand and picking daisies with the other... On a battlefield there's no room for love...Love is weak, love is blind, love makes one loose their focus irremediably fast- just look at my airheaded sister , she's all the example any person in their rightfull mind would need in order to convince themselvs I'm right ...I could never afford that luxury...

Even a common soldier can disconnect from time to time from the murderous scenario he has to face almost daily if he lives long enough, go home- see his wife and kids, have a drink with the rest of his fellows villagers at the local tavern, swapping tips on raising root vegetables...Well, I can't do that. You see...I'm War- for me, the battle never ends. It's always there, present within me, waiting for the right moment to resurface, and when it finally does, there's suddenly carnage everywhere...My blood is intoxicated with the drug of rampage and udder destruction...and there's nothing sweet and cute about that one is it...unless you're part of some bloody, dark foreign God's cult that I don't know of...?

That's why with Xena it's different... That's what sets her apart from all the other thousands of women I screwed from the beginning of time- we're pretty much the same...And when I say **"pretty much**" I actually mean identical- like **"mirror image"** identical...

That primary instinct of power and domination, buried deep inside her along with that out of the ordinary intelligence, skills and beauty make her a flawless weapon...or so it started...It only took about a few months for me to wanna reconsider that initial status though, turning it into the one of the Goddess of War. She hasn't accepted yet, but it's only a matter of time, and I have plenty of time to wait for her to come around...

I've always said that the perfume of blood and Death is unquestionably addictive...she knows it, I know it, and despite the fact that she's currently trying to deny it for the sake of redemption, soul cleansing and Hades knows what other kind of mambo jumbo concepts, as I told her, as much as she'd like to, she will never be able to stray too much from the path I chose for her...Destiny never changes...

Whereas for me, I guess I could never stay too mad at her, no matter what she does...

I've seen her crying herself to sleep after I left, tears soaking the pillow...again, it should have given me ultimate satisfaction after the whole Jerkules stunt she pulled...It didn't work out of course...I hate to see her hurting no matter the cause...

Plus, ... she chose to stay...after everything that happened, she chose to stay...Sweet mother of Zeus, I would never get to fully understand this woman! One minute she hates my guts and the other she refuses to leave my bed...Unpredictability- another thing I madly love about her...

She did toss and turn a lot when she finally entered the Fantasy Land though, cunningly assaulted by nightmares – an unpleasant experience that had slipped her memory for awhile now...I made sure that Morpheus "forgot" to do his job properly tonight when it came to her...from Lyceus' death to me having a blast with a few naked ladies, plus a very special bonus including slaughtered men and crucified prisoners , I gave her the chance to see it all... As far as I'm concerned, we're even now...

Still, she can't know that she's already forgiven and that it would only take one fallen tear of regret for me to overlook any mistake she might have committed, cause, being the smart girl that she is, my pretty little Princess would instantly take advantage of my weakness before I can even realize what's happening...

I'd better play it safe...keep her on pins and needles for another week or two...That "patience is a virtue" old saying does have a grain of truth in it after all...

Casting one last gaze at the long ebony strand covering her face as she edgily rolls onto her back pushing some invisible slut off me with a rough jolt, I can't suppress a wide grin as I hear her murmuring my name. Before her muffled voice trails off, I automatically extend a hand over her body in the generous intention of making all those nasty bruises covering it from head to toe vanish, starting with her right cheek and her neck and ending with her waist- making sure to linger a bit more on top of her belly where I know I should focus my energy on healing her inner wounds... That almost dry stream of blood I can still see on her inner thigh, is giving me the chills...

"Sleep tight my Princess" I slowly whisper against her ear once I'm done, hardly touching her forehead withteh tip of my fingers to stop the nightmares from haunting her for the rest of the morning...

"I'll see you soon..."


	11. Light

Way before I open my eyes, I can feel the coolness of the morning air. I lazily stretch out my arms, adamantly refusing to look around, my mind still half trapped in the intriguing illusion of a dream that my reason is fighting great battles to decipher, instinctively reaching out a hand to find the warmness of his body, just to discover that there's nothing there.

Perceiving his absence, my eyes flutter open almost instantly, all the previous numbness and stiffness of my body vanishing as if they had never even been there...Seconds later, as I wake up completely I almost start laughing at my utter stupidity...I'm back in the clearing where me and Hercules made love yesterday, carefully covered up with two thick blankets that I don't actually recognize as being my own, just a few feet from a still burning camp fire...

As I hesitantly shake my head, still unsure about what's wrong with the picture, as if I'm missing some well hidden, but vitally important detail here, a wave of realization washes over me like only a cold shower could, as an endless chain of flashing images begins wrapping around my brain squeezing real hard until it all comes back to me: Ares, the temple, the screams, those cutting words that we've been shouting at each other the entire night, the sex, the pain, his permanently disappointed gaze whenever he looked at me...him leaving...the tears rolling down my cheeks long after...

I wish this weren't real ...I wish it were all but a figment of my imagination...a dream from which I'm lilkely to wake up any minute now...

That theory falls apart in less than a heartbeat nonetheless as I suddenly feel the irrepressible need to breathe, as if I haven't done it for awhile now, but it's like there's not enough air for me to inhale... The oxygen doesn't seem to reach my lungs, remaining trapped at some level inside my throat...

He didn't want me there anymore...that's why he sent me back here...That's why he left last night in the first place, refusing to at least hold me until I fell asleep –I didn't ask him too, that's true, but I usually didn't even have too...He obviously hates me...

The mere thought makes me feel a huge, uncomfortable knot in my stomach, and I can't help frowning at the sensation.

As I tilt my head a bit to the right, my blood instantly freezes the moment I notice a splendid black rose just inches from my face, and my hearts starts drumming loudly inside my chest while every grey cell of my tormented brain is looking for a valid explanation for this...It was him...it must have been him...who else would know about it?

With the most gentle gesture imaginable, I pick it up...Despite myself, a bright smile breaks free on my visage, stretching sheepishly the corners of my lips...I can still feel his energy lingering on the roses' petals...It was him...

Inhaling deeply, I part my lips to call him...I want to see him...I guess I need to know where we stand...but I know I can't. Not right now. Maybe we both need a little time for ourselves after all...It will certainly offer us both the chance to meditate some more on those damn perspectives on life...

As I lay the flower back on the grass, I pull the blankets back over me, expertly masking the tears that have began dropping again, just in case that he's watching from some empty throne room, somewhere...I guess I'll just bask back in the luxury of blissful sleep for another hour or too...At least today, I won't be a morning person...

XXX

A week has passed since the morning I transported her back to her camp, desperately trying to keep her away from me, to partially disconnect my mind and soul from that horrible torture of having to learn to live with the awareness of her betrayal and of that almost surreal night in which only the Fates can tell where and how did I find the strength to hold back that amazingly powerful urge to carve and mutilate her in the worst possible ways before sending her to Hades with my own hands...

She hasn't called me yet...I can't help wondering if she will ever do it again...Is this just a phase or there's way to much baggage in order to have things the way they were...?

I can't stand this... I open up a portal, wanting to check on her. It's nightfall, and she's all alone, trying to stir up a camp fire...Considering those goosebumps covering her skin, she's cold ...The wind is blowing too...it must be chilly out there...

As I bite my lower lip trying to make a decision, I extend my hand, adamant about closing the portal and materializing on a battlefield in Lesbos, from where I can hear the voices of the wounded crying out my name before they die...I should be there...

The next second I'm gone...not in Lesbos of course, those people will loose their lives anyway regardless of my presence there- they knew they were in over their heads before they started that foolish attack in the first place-they deserve to die-...but, in the middle of nowhere, in some Gods forgotten forest, where I can already hear some wild beats howling like crazy...they're probably hungry...

I'm still invisible but she can definitely sense my presence...She doesn't say anything, but I can see it in her eyes- that very familiar shade of affection glistening like silver in the moonlight...

With a wave of my hand, I light up the fire for her. She's still quiet, but this time, a slight arch of her eyebrow , is subtily letting me know that she appreciates my "efforts" .

As if in slow motion, I can see her sit down next to the fire , and , with the most gracious of movements, she begins sharpening her sword...I can't help smiling- she always does that when she's nervous. I don't know if she has ever realized it, but she does...

Slowly, very slowly, I close in the distance between us, and call it prudence if you will, but my eyes are open wide for any sign of abrupt kick that could knock me of my feet harder and faster than Zeus ' lightening bolts...And if If I'm not mistaken, she has every intention of doing that pretty soon.

...Too my immeasurable surprise, she refuses to react in any way though, not even when I sit down behind her. I can visibly see her muscles tense, but she still acts as if I/m not even here...Everything changes though when I wrap my arms tight around her waist and I place a feather like kiss on her shoulder...

She chuckles softly, and noticing her reaction finally allows me to breathe normally again...She's not angry anymore...I hope that's a good thing though- with Xena, the unexpected is most of the time followed by a cortège of pain and misery...

"Hi" I whisper seductively against her ear, and I can hear her gasp at the sound of my voice...Sweet Olympus, I'm telling you, what this woman is capable of doing to me it's...incredible...

"Hi there" she murmurs back, letting her sword down and leaning irresistibly into my embrace, her eyes fixed on the playful flames of the fire before us...

"I've missed you..." I add while tenderly brushing my lips against her neck, that unique, sweet smell of her pearly skin making me instinctively tighten my hold on her as if fearing that she could somehow dematerialize from my arms...

I don't even know at what point I gave up on that invisibility shield I was using but I do know that at the speed with which the blood began racing through my veins the minute she started kissing the back of my wrist , any mortal would have been killed on spot...I guess that's one of the advantages of being immortal...ultra shock resistance carcass.

"Did you?" she promptly inquires, challenging me to add some spicy details to my almost audible previous statement.

"You have no idea..." I murmur, giving her exactly what she needed to hear "I've been thinking about you"

Before I know it, she starts chuckling again, turning around to look me in this eyes this time, and my lips refuse to move the instant her mesmerizingly cerulean moons fix me with their piercing gaze...

"Have I told you that you're a Lying Bastard?"

Gods, I want this woman so much!

"Not recently..." I answer, barely touching her lips with the tip of my fingers...

"You're such Lying Bastard!" she exclaims, on such a sexy tone that would push any straight man to rip her cloths off her within a blink.

"Are you kidding me? I have never told one lie in my life...I'm not even familiarised with the procedure..." I keep on playing the game, still entranced by that bright sparkle of happiness I can see in her eyes...

"You're such a hatable person!" she retorts, slapping my chest playfully.

There's no answer coming from my mouth now, I'm just looking at her...contemplating her unmatchable beauty, wondering if it would be wise to kiss her or not...

Never mind...she does it for me, and before I know it, we're trapped into each other's arms, our lips crushing hungrily, tongues, hearts and minds entwining into such a fiery kiss that I can literally feel my entire being melting into hers, as we gradually get rid of our clothes, hands gliding right about everywhere, and for many, many hours I can't focus on anything else than her vibrant moans and those sweet notes escaping from her throat as we both come, over and over again, each explosion adding more fireworks to the overall scenery...

XXX

There's still an hour or two till dawn, and she doesn't seem too tired. As she snuggles her head in the crock of my neck, her eyes are closed, but I know she has no intention of sleeping-her body is way to tense for that...

"What's on your mind, Princess?" I inquire on a mild voice, kissing her forehead lovingly.

She waits a bit before offering me an answer, obviously pondering the effects of her decision.

I caress her hair encouragingly.

"This doesn't change anything, Ares. I'm not coming back to..."

I refuse to let her finish that phrase though. It still hurts like shit.

"I know, ok? You wanna play Hero. I got that..."

She's just eying me suspiciously right now, waiting for me to start my usual "I'd rather kill you than let you leave my side" speech.

"What? "

"Nothing..." she replies, avoiding my inquiring gaze.

"You thought that I was going to try and stop you didn't you? "

"Well...it does fit your peacock pride perfectly, so...yeah, that was my initial guess, I suppose..."

"Listen Xena...Don't expect me to take back everything I told you that night regarding your destiny cause I wont. I'm right and you know it, and if hypothetically speaking you don't know it yet, you'll get the chance to see it too, in no time...I won't force you to do something that you don't wanna do, ok? I've never done that, when it came to you and I'm not about to start now...But don't expect me to sit around doing nothing while you waste you talents with some pitiful maggots living in some cave at the outskirts of some worthless town. I'll always be one step behind you, making things interesting, constantly reminding you that there's a different life waiting for you just a whisper away..."

"I'd expect nothing less...Still..." she trailed off gazing at me expectantly, as if trying to get my undivided attention.

"Yes?"

"Don't forget your promise..."

"I won't. I'll always be there for you. No matter what..."

"Even now that we' re on different sides?"

Her voice sounds a bit broken and insecure now.

"Yes" I answer firmly, kissing her lips lightly.

As her eyes close back again, Morpheus finally calling her into that colored, enchanted land of his, I murmur gravely against her ear:

"Sweet...when you wake up tomorrow...you should go to Potidea...you can start your heroic stuff there...I've heard they're in desperate need for a girl with a chackram..."

She smiles devilishly, squeezing my hand lightly, already half asleep:

"Setting traps already?"

"Neah...till morning comes, we're still on the same side, right?"

"What's in Potidea?"

"Your irritating sidekick"

"Are you talking in your sleep right now, Ares? What sidekick? I don't want a sidekick! I work alone!"

"Well suite yourself but look around! Every Hero has one! It's...fashionable...I guess. "

"Shut up and go to sleep War God! You're going bananas!"

"Just do as I tell you...You'll thank me later!"...

"Fine, fine!" she finally mumbles, yawning deeply and drapping an arm around my waist...

_"You'll definitely thank me later, Luv" _the words echo inside my head as I let my eyes close for awhile...I still can't believe I told her about Blondie...Maybe she won't go there after all...Maybe it won't last an eternity to have her back...

THE END


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